It can be tough to deal with unwanted attention. It can feel awkward to figure out how to tell someone to stop contacting you politely.
This article provides some guidelines on how to set boundaries respectfully, communicate clearly, and minimize drama.
Assessing the situation
Before you say anything, pause and ask yourself these questions.
- What kind of relationship do you have with this person? Are they a friend, family member, ex, or someone else?
- Is the contact excessive, or does it just happen now and then?
- Is the content harmless, or is it inappropriate? (If it’s gotten to the point of excessive texting, that could be considered harassment.)
Your answers will help you choose the best approach. You might be direct with a friend, but you might choose to be gentler with a family member.
Communicating your boundaries
Choosing your words
Always be clear and direct, but polite. For example, “I appreciate you thinking of me, but I need some space right now.” Avoid being ambiguous. State your needs explicitly.
Setting expectations
What behavior do you want to change? For instance, “Please don’t contact me unless it’s urgent.” Be realistic. Sometimes it’s not possible or appropriate to completely end contact.
Consider the medium
What’s the best way to have this conversation? If you’re dealing with a delicate situation, a phone call may be better than a text.
HANDLING THE RESPONSE
Be prepared for how the other person might react. They could be understanding, upset, confused, or even angry. If they don’t respect your wishes, calmly and firmly restate your request.
If they still won’t respect your wishes, you may have to block them or even legally tell them to stop to prevent them from contacting you again.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do you politely get someone to stop texting you?
The key is directness coupled with kindness. You could say something like, “Hey, I appreciate you reaching out, but I’m trying to cut down on screen time/focus on other things right now, so I won’t be able to respond to texts as often.” This sets a clear boundary without being accusatory.
How do you politely tell someone to stop bothering you?
Frame it in terms of your own needs or limitations. For instance, “I’m really swamped with work/personal commitments at the moment, so I’m finding it hard to keep up with everything. I need to focus my energy elsewhere for a while.” This avoids implying they’re inherently bothersome, focusing instead on your capacity.
How to respectfully tell someone to stop contacting you?
Acknowledge the value of their communication before setting the boundary. “I value our connection/friendship, but I need some space right now to recharge/deal with some personal matters. I hope you understand.” This approach recognizes the relationship while clearly stating your need for distance.
How do you professionally tell someone to stop calling you?
In a professional context, emphasize efficiency and appropriate channels. “To ensure I can address your inquiries promptly, please email me/submit a ticket through our support portal. This allows me to prioritize and respond in the most effective way. I’m not always available by phone.” This redirects communication to a more manageable format.
The bottom line
Telling someone to stop contacting you requires clear communication and firm boundaries. Always tailor your approach to your specific circumstances.
Prioritize your safety and well-being. If you feel threatened or harassed, don’t hesitate to seek help from friends, family, or law enforcement.